Gorgeous and distant film. Somber and emotionally unsatisfying, but with a unique gift for displaying the connectedness within the nothingness. That we are not alone in our aloneness.
We drink gin and sometimes I get lost in myself, as everyone around becomes enraptured in conversation. I am unable to focus on anything but the calm feline gaze and the sweat building as I sink further into the green suede. I wonder what the point of it all is, though I enjoy the group being together. There seems to be little to talk about, as we all know so much and have seen such hidden fragments of one another, and even less to say as the liquor numbs our insides. As usual, a general malaise paired with the heat and my Xanax makes me drowsy earlier than the rest.
I think about my brother and how he hasn’t responded to my texts. I think about how desperately I miss Rach and her ability to liven any gathering. I think about how I am certainly not destined for a life entertaining at cocktail parties.
The neighbor comes over and discussion gets more interesting, but I announce that I will retire to bed and there is little protest. It is nearly 3am, afterall. You crawl in next to me later and your body is warm and sticky with perspiration. I curl up and feel you holding me and the deepest of slumbers ensues.
You tell me you dreamed we were on a train and coins of all shapes and sizes came tumbling out the pockets of strangers. I pray this means we are destined for good fortune.
This week I purchase fans. Bone People. Misadventures learning Mandarin and applying for Visas. And maybe play chess at a coffee shop. Perhaps I should attempt to revitalize Midnight Movie Film Club or trivia night. I hear Yabo’s Tacos has one on Tuesday nights. I can’t help but feel my life just sliding around underneath me like a toboggan. I am anxious to get off this ride. I feel slightly nauseous.
Is it wrong that I’m impatient to go away in small part to have something to say when I return?
Brentwood Library, Tennessee
Hope the renovations make our library this fantastic.
Meet the Auburn Tigers, Australia’s first all Muslim Woman Football Team! Read their story on hijabican
My absolute favorite thing about this project (and what I really hoped for when I first started out) is the chance to be personally introduced by extraordinarily talented artists that I probably wouldn’t have found otherwise.
From one of my new favorite illustrators, kiwiwikiwi. I believe this is also my first parcel from Poland!
Rose Petal Teacup (2013) by Danielle Renee
Petals of white and pink roses